Teenage Hormones

I teach two mother-daughter duos in yoga, both daughters are teenagers. This week was the first time I really remembered what it was like to be a teenager. The drama, the tears, the worry. Everything seemed so final. And you just thought things would be simpler if you were grown.  I distinctly remember having intense feelings of anger at my mother as a teenager. For doing simple things, such as having a curfew for me or not allowing me to date a senior when I was a freshman. Things that I will definitely enforce with my own daughter. I remember feeling like my mother didn't understand me and the things I was going through during that stage of my life. The pressure from peers and adults alike was exhausting. This stage of our lives was where we decided what kind of people we become. Not the job we have or the goals we set, but the actual people. We make choices in our youth that guide us with their consequences, both good and bad. Everything really is dramatic because we are becoming whole. I recognized that in both of these beautiful and full of doubt, young women this week. I know their mothers see it daily. Being a teenager was hard. Being a mom to a teenager, a million times harder. I watched these mothers with their daughters and saw the true love that is there. The struggle to help in some way and still allow their daughters to make the choices on their own. It was fascinating and terrifying at the same time. Through these teenage girls and their mothers, I remembered my life, my choices, and my feelings. I hope that it helps guide me through my mothering as the teen years approach for my daughter. It will be difficult. Awful and amazing at times. But seeing these girls this week, both at some sort of struggle, helped me to remember. That, I think, is the key. To remember and use that to help your daughter, so she can, in turn, repeat the whole process sometime in the future.

Questioning Myself
 Do you ever have those days when you wonder if you are doing what you should be doing? I am a teacher in a private school. I have been a teacher since 2002. Ten years in the public school system and I am in my third year in private education. I have taught second grade, fifth grade, and currently first, second, third, and fourth grade in one classroom. I am good with children. They learn well from me. This isn't bragging, just the truth. I am very good at my job. But there are many days when I ask myself if I am really cut out to be a teacher. I have little patience. Kids sometimes annoy me. I don't want to bend over backwards for every child. And there are a couple kids that simply make me cringe with the sound of their voice. So, yeah, on days like today, I wonder. I enjoy seeing the light come on when the curriculum I have just taught actually clicks and makes sense. I really love to hear them read and get excited about something they are learning. The joy on their faces over simple pleasures remind me that happiness can come from hearing an extra chapter during circle time or coloring with sharp crayons. But sometimes I just want to work with grown-ups. Then I stop and think. Are they any better? With children, I can tell them to stop talking, stay out of my bubble, or teach them the proper way to read social cues. Unfortunately with adults, I have to listen to them talk, (or at least pretend), walk away, or assume that they read my social cues and don't care. Which is worse? Or...which is better? On this day when I question my career, I think about the ups and downs of teaching. Do my ups outweigh my downs? Definitely. But man, today I would have rather been anywhere else.

Let's talk about the word literally.

My husband and I have a few words we feel have become used incorrectly: literally and migraine. 

Literally. The meaning of the word literally has changed. Society has beaten the word down with constant misuse, changing the definition from a word meaning "in actuality" to "in effect," which deeply saddens me. I hate to hear words misused and then we actually change the meaning to fit the misuse! My "secret writer" soul is heartbroken. Literally has become second nature to most people in everyday speak, they literally use it at least once in a conversation. Literally. As I hear my children speak this nonsense, I have banned the use of the word in my presence at home. It literally gives me a migraine. Which leads to that word...migraine. A headache is not a migraine, people. A headache is something that hurts. A lot. It can last a long time and make you feel like you want to curl up in bed and not move. But a migraine is a whole different ball game. Having had both headaches and migraines, I can tell you that a migraine is on another level. When I hear people say they are battling a migraine, while they drink their coffee, listen to music, and squint a little at the sun, I want to scream! Migraines are serious. They can make you see colors, (as learned recently from a 7-year-old),  vomit, dry heave, and basically want to cut your own head off, just to relieve the pain. They are incredibly awful and just not the same. So next time you literally have a migraine, think for just a moment...what do you really mean?